Developing Management Skills

Chapter 4 building relationships by communicating supportively

Supportive communication seeks to address a problem while preserving the relationship

2 types of coaching situations: giving advice and direction for behavior change, and counseling situations where problem understanding and recognition are desired

2 Obstacles to effective interpersonal communication: Defensiveness (focusing on defending yourself rather than listening) & Disconfirmation (belittling the other person)

8 rules of supportive communication:

1) Congruent communication is consistency between your feelings and thoughts

2) Use objective statements, your reactions and their objective consequences; suggest alternatives

3) Use problem oriented statements to focus on behavioral specifics, rather than people

4) Use validating statements

5) Use statements that are specific and regarding items that are under their control

6) Use conjunctive statements and acknowledge what was said before

7) Own your statements and use “I” words rather than “we”

8) Demonstrate supportive listening by eye contact and nonverbal ques

3 Steps of Descriptive Communication:

1) Objectively describe the event behavior or circumstance

2) Focus on the behavior and your reaction

3) Focus on solutions

You can invalidate people by: superiority, rigidity, indifference and imperviousness

“Most Conjunctive” refers to an immediately preceding statement

“Conjunctive” refers to a statement that was made earlier in the conversation

“Less Conjunctive” is something not stated previously but both parties understand

Disjunctive refers to nothing that has been said or that the parties share in common.

4 Supportive Listening Response Types: 1) Advising, 2) Deflecting, 3) Probing, 4) Reflecting

4 Types of Probing Reponses: 1) Elaboration, 2) Clarification, 3) Repetition, 4) Reflection,

PMI (personal management interview) is two steps: 1) Role negotiation session where a written record is made of the agreements. 2) Ongoing one-on-one meetings either twice a month or monthly.

Purpose of PMI meetings is to foster improvement and strengthen relationships. PMI meetings consist of 1) org and managerial problems, 2) Information sharing, 3) Interpersonal issues, 4) Obstacles to improvement, 5) Training in management skills, 6) Individual needs, 7) Feedback on job performance and personal capabilities 8) Personal concerns

First action item of PMI’s are follow-up on the action items generated by the previous meeting. Last action is review of items generated by the meeting.

Chapter 5 Gaining Power and Influence

Power is defined as the potential to influence other people’s behavior

Personal power sources (Expertise, Attractiveness [charisma, agreeable behavior and physical characteristics], Effort [being extremely dependable also going above and beyond], Legitimacy-strong beliefs aligned with organizational values)

Increase the “centrality” of your position by connecting diverse contacts who normally wouldn’t interact, working with people outside your immediate workgroup.

Structural holes-when two people within your network are unconnected and possess different sources of information.

Increase the Flexibility of your position: reducing routine, expanding task variety, new ideas, new project involvement, participate in early stages of decision making processes

Proactive personality: a tendency to effect change in one’s environment.

Increase visibility: contacts with movers and shakers, oral presentations, problem solve with task forces, senior managers to help with recognitions, personal notes, face-to-face contact

Increase relevance: Outreach role (Providing services and information to other groups), Monitoring and evaluating activities, become involved in org’s top priority activities, become a trainer or mentor for new members.

Sell issues to superiors: Should be congruent with role, issue presented honestly, broadly, culture compatible, it’s solvable, clarify payoff, identify needs, management’s responsibility, be succinct with data, bundle with other similar and important issues, get others supporter and use public forums.

Retribution strategies (threaten) for: imbalance of power, commitment unimportant, quality and innovation is irrelevant, serious violation or emergency situation.

Reciprocity strategies (gain compliance) for: parties are dependent on each other, adequate time, parties’ trust each other, needs are specific and short term.

Reason strategies for (compliance volunteered): few time constraints, initiative and innovation are paramount, and you have high interpersonal trust and a long term relationship with low conflict, respected personal goals

Neutralize retribution influence: explaining consequences, actively resist

Neutralize reciprocity influence: examine the context of any favor giving, confront using escalating tactics, refuse to bargain until inequality is addressed

Neutralize reason influence by: EARS, (Empathize, Ask for Alternatives, Render Negotiations, and Settle on Strategy), protect yourself, and lastly firmly refuse to comply

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Note on Developing Management Skills Chapters 4 & 5, created by Brad Powers on 12/10/2016.