Below is sample feedback from teacher Ryan Curry to a student. Read the teacher’s response and then select what areas the teacher could make improvements to the feedback.
"This paper did not make any sense. Did you even bother reading what you wrote before you submitted it? There were a lot of spelling errors and words that don’t even seem like words. Abbreviated text like “ur” and “idek” are not acceptable forms of responses. You should write out the words such as “you are” and “I don’t even know”. Additionally, your points of view conflicted. At one point you stated, “feudalism was clearlly a bad idea bc the ppl didn’t have a say and ur not going to want 2 do nething someone tells u.” At another point, you said, “idek what the ppl would hav done w/o having a king to protect them so they probablee didn’t hav it 2 bad if the king and his knights protektid them for food nd work.” It is unclear if you felt Feudalism was effective or ineffective, which was the whole point of the paper. You clearly need to read the directions more carefully. When taking a stance, make sure to pick one belief, and stick with it. For example, if you believed that feudalism was a bad idea, make sure to list three points to back up the point (such as how it impacted peasants’ freedoms). If you agree that feudalism was an effective ideal, make sure to explain if it was a good idea using three points, such as how the peasants could get protection from the king or his knights."
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