Chapter 1

Question	Answer
People tend to talk about relationships in terms of	Work, commitment, involvement, uniqueness, manipulation, consideration and respect, journey or discovery, game, risky, uncontrollable forces, bargaining and trade offs
Types of involvement themes	Communal themes "we", individual themes "I", impersonal themes: outside forces
Assumption of consistency	We want others to be consistent, but we do not want our inconsistencies to be pointed out
Assumption of Simple Meaning	We often mean multiple things at once, we can't rely only on what the words say
Assumption of communicator independence	We talk about relationships as if the our behavior didn't contribute to the problem. Communication problems are the result of mutual contributions
Assumption of Obvious Causation	Quick to jump to conclusions about why someone said something. Be careful when assuming things.
Assumption of Finality	People may reach a compromise when there is a disagreement, but the issue could potentially come up any time later.
Narrow	Broad
Stylized	Unique
Difficult	Efficient
Rigid	Flexible
Awkward	Smooth
Public	Personal
Hesitant	Spontaneous
Overt judgement suspended	Overt judgment given
Public	Personal

Resource summary

	Created by Megan McPherson about 8 years ago