Working with Families to Support Self-Esteem

Their self-confidence shows in the way they dress, groom themselves, walk and talk.

They are secure and happy.

They are more likely to be himself or herself.

They are outgoing, strong, proud, motivated, successful, independent and assertive.

Talent, good looks and financial success bring high self-esteem.

Values resulting from an ongoing self-appraisal in which traits and abilities are acknowledged and evaluated.

Having constant sunshiny happiness is the definition of high self-esteem.

The same values each person in all cultures has of oneself.

They help the child learn to draw boundaries and discover her/his separateness.

They encourage a close interdependence between child and adult.

They encourage the child to decide s/he is great as s/he is and to give that message to the world.

They help the child find ways of feeling worthy in their own culture.

through collaborative effort between the individual, culture and community

it is up to the individual to develop a new perception of herself or himself

his or her family must create the change

the individual must be removed from negative media influences

It's not possible to counteract the negative messages that may be encountered outside the home.

Children can be taught by parents how to survive and stand up to racism, sexism or ableism.

Parents can teach children to accept differential treatment and a feeling of inferiority.

Self-esteem doesn't begin to develop until adolescence, so parents need not be concerned with it during childhood.

Vow always to be positive and praise children at every possible opportunity.

Comment on how and why the child is better than other children.

Be a cheerleader for everything the child does.

Give more honest feedback and encouragement than praise.

Just talk to the child about her or his success.

Make every task easy enough for the child to experience constant success.

Challenge children so that when success comes they've worked for it.

Make sure that the child is never forced to take a risk.

Being blind to differences

Having special events that celebrate population groups, such as a Japanese "tea party"

Responding positively and appropriately to individual differences

Accepting that bias is natural and there is no hope for change

have nothing to do with the way the adult sees herself or himself

encourage people to change themselves

can only be effectively used between members of a family

focus on strengths and encourage parents to see how they can be while accepting how they are at the present